These are supposedly

Actual Answers from Music Exams

(I think I'll start keeping a list myself!)

The principal singer of 19th century opera was called pre-Madonna.

It is easy to teach anyone to play the maracas.  Just grip the neck and shake him in rhythm.

Gregorian chant has no music, just singers singing the same lines.

Sherbet composed the Unfinished Symphony.

An interval in music is the distance from one piano to the next.

All female parts were sung by castrati.  We don't know exactly what they sounded like because there are no known descendants.

Young scholars have expressed their rapture for the Bronze Lullaby, the Taco Bell Cannon, Beethoven's Eritoca, Tchaikovsky Cracknutter Suite, and Gershwin's Rap City in Blue.

Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel; if they sing without music it is called Acapulco.

A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.

Contralto is a low sort of music that only ladies sing.

Diatonic is a low calorie Schweppes.

The best fugue was the one between the Hatfields and the McCoys.

The main trouble with a French Horn is that it is too tangled up.

The correct way to find the key to a piece of music is to use a pitchfork.

Agitato is a state of mind when one's finger slips while playing a piece.

I know what a sextet is but I'd rather not say.

Most authorities agree that music of antiquity was written long ago.

My favorite composer was Opus. 

Agnus Dei was a woman composer famous for her church music.

Henry Purcell was a famous composer few people have ever heard of.

Rock Monanoff was a famous post-romantic composer of piano concerti.

Created and maintained by Vicky V. Johnson